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Friendship

Let go of your expectations to find unexpected connections on Yubo

3 minutes read

- Written by Yubo Team

A group of young women taking a picture with their iPhone

Swipe? Nah – maybe? Nah. Swipe? Maybe yes? Seems friendly enough, but what if they’re not? Is that what I want? How could I possibly know?

It’s unclear when dating apps started feeling like trying to keep a job, but it’s unanimous – they just do. Every week, more articles about dating-app burnout pop up on the Internet. It is reported that younger generations feel the most tired of endless swiping, with 80% of millennials and 79% of Gen Z admitting to feelings of fatigue associated with dating online.

The problem with dating apps

Using dating apps often feels impersonal, and creating your own profile has long turned into a weird marketing exercise with hours spent on selecting pictures and honing in your bio. It’s interesting, too, how dating apps, designed to connect us, can actually make people feel lonelier. The more profiles you swipe, the more people blur into a faceless mass of “maybes” or “not-quites.” So why are dating apps so popular and so frustrating at the same time? We found three main reasons for this.

  1. A lack of real connection
    With countless potential match options on dating apps, engaging in numerous identical conversations at the same time soon becomes tedious. After all, there's a limit to how many times you can ask someone their favorite color! Given the chances that the conversation will fizzle out, you're inclined to invest minimal energy in initial chats. Then, you find yourself trapped in a cycle: matching, having lifeless conversations, and ultimately never hearing from them again… only to match the next person, with little-to-no hope of a better outcome.
  2. Endless swiping
    Have you seen so many profiles that everyone starts blending together like one giant TikTok algorithm of red flags and awkward mirror selfies? Relatable? Endless swiping can become demoralizing, and studies even show that the use of dating apps is often linked to increased anxiety, lower self-esteem, and frustration. People are left feeling like they’re auditioning for a part they never get, endlessly comparing themselves and their matches until they don’t even know who they are anymore.
  3. Rigidity of expectations
    Dating apps often pressure you to know and disclose what you're looking for immediately. It goes even deeper than just defining if you’re looking for a long-term relationship or something more casual. The reason to go on a dating app is to try to find someone to date. However, most lasting relationships are found organically, when you aren't trying at all. Arguably, putting emphasis on dating from the get-go creates a rigidity and kills the element of surprise that is so fundamental to building social relationships. Here at Yubo, we try to bring serendipity and surprise back into online social interactions, allowing our users to forego labels and expectations when connecting with someone new.

Finding lost magic

There is something special about meeting someone new. You start talking with them – let’s say at a friend’s party, or in a gaming Discord channel – and you get to connect freely, without any pressure or expectations. Possibilities are truly endless: you can go on to become close friends after a while, or start meeting up every Saturday for a game of Among Us, or just never talk to them again.

Real connection takes time and often starts with the simplest forms of companionship. Think back to being a kid – when you went up to your new bestie in the playground, did you think about what they could do for you? Did you judge them on their jacket or wonder if you’d be friends five years down the line? No! They were there and you were here, and you wanted someone to chill with. From those simple beginnings, you made a connection that could last for the rest of your lives. Or not – and that was okay too. Here at Yubo, we want to recreate that magical serendipity that was a large part of our lives back when we were kids. So, how do we do it?

  1. Multiple connection points
    While it’s possible to make friends whilst swiping on Yubo, it’s not the only way to meet new people on the app. The Live tab is one such place, where you can browse people having video and voice conversations in real life, or alternatively start your own and wait for other people to join! This allows for deeper connections like seeing someone’s face, body language and mannerisms, or hearing their voice, which can make you click a lot faster than matching and chatting via text messages. You can also find friends through our Fast Add feature, which forgoes swiping and sends out 100, 200 or 500 friend requests to random people on the app. Without the selection process, you can start building connections with people you wouldn’t normally swipe right on, allowing you to be surprised by the unexpected. You can explore without judging or evaluating, and it gives you a chance to relax, knowing you’re not being judged or assessed either.
  2. No expectations
    Now that finding "the one" is off the table, there are quite a lot of options opening up before you. Talking and exploring in a relaxed setting is conducive to making connections you didn’t even know you needed. Going with the flow and letting the conversation shape your expectations, rather than the other way around, may be surprising, in a good way. Here at Yubo, we believe in online spaces that give us the possibility to play without the constant fear of being judged, allowing people to meet in a context where expectations are lower, but the potential for meaningful connection is higher. Social discovery apps let you hang out without the pressure of the never-ending series of first dates.

Here at Yubo, we prize one thing above all else – friendship. Maybe it’s time we all started connecting without the pressure to find “the one.” Maybe they’re not the one, but they could just be the best thing that happened to your weekend. Friendship apps encourage connections that bring joy, depth, and authenticity without the pressure of romance. And in a world that’s become so obsessed with finding “someone,” maybe the real victory lies in finding people who simply make life richer and more exciting.


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